Straight

Rochelle sets us a one hundred word flash fiction challenge, prompted by a photo, every week.  Come and have a go, if you think you’re bard enough.

https://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/

tunnel

“Are you bloody stupid or what?” Davidson’s reputation for not suffering fools gladly went before him. Kev was literally quaking in his boots, but bewildered: what could have gone wrong?
“Boss, I double and treble checked the figures,”
“Well you’ve got it wrong just the same: we’ve come underneath the tunnel we were supposed to meet.”
“ I’ve been at the theodolite every step of the way: we’ve tunnelled as straight as a die.”
“Straight! You fucking cretin. We’ve tunnelled four miles. What about the curvature of the earth?”
“Whoops! I didn’t think of that.” (95)

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About micklively

Fifty-something, pacifist, six sigma black belt, lean implementer, brewer, vintner, guitarist, wood-turner, and slave to collies.
This entry was posted in fiction, humour, joke, writing and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

28 Responses to Straight

  1. asarpota says:

    Nice twist.. Curvature with a straight..

  2. gahlearner says:

    Hehe. Things like that do happen. Funny take on the prompt (you’ve been busy this week!)

  3. afairymind says:

    Oops! That’s the type of mistake I’d make – maths is not something I’ve ever been good at! Amusing story. 🙂

  4. Margaret Leggatt says:

    I guess they’ll have to keep digging a while longer, hopefully in the right direction this time. Your ‘curvature of the earth’ phrase reminded me of Bruce Dawe’s poem ‘Homecoming’ – an old favourite of mine. Fun story.

  5. ansumani says:

    He may still thinking the earth is flat…..Nice one.

  6. Oh dear, a mistake I would’ve made too. Although i can’t draw a straight line so maybe I would’ve got there after all! 🙂 Loved the voice!

  7. Haha–a story highlighting the difficulties of math, among other things (or maybe that’s just how I read it)–a good one! I’ll try to keep the curvature of the earth in mind.

    • micklively says:

      Actually, this piece contains two huge errors from me: deviation from straight for earth curvature is around six feet for every nine miles, so they wouldn’t totally miss over four; and if you went straight you’d naturally come out over and not under your destination (assuming you’d done everything else right!).
      Many thanks for your feedback Emily.

  8. gravadee says:

    hahaha..opps…

  9. Dale says:

    Measure twice, cut (or dig) once!

  10. draliman says:

    Oops! I was wondering if it was the old “yards/metres” thing like the Channel Tunnel cartoons, but your explanation is very cool.
    I love your “Come and have a go, if you think you’re bard enough” intro 🙂

    • micklively says:

      I plagiarised the “bard” line from a poet from Ripley (whose name I can’t remember). I can’t remember where the “earth curvature” bit came from.
      Many thanks for your feedback.

  11. Like the above comment…love fucking cretin…might be my new catch phrase. You have a knack for this genre like I’ve said before. So hard to be brief and bully at the same time…bully means first-rate by the way…a Teddy Roosevelt term 🙂

  12. Ha.. that’s one way to see the light.

  13. Vinay Leo R. says:

    How strange! I didn’t think of that either 😀

    This picture really has seen the light in your blog today, Mick 🙂 Hattrick of interesting stories. More to come perhaps?

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