Bleak

carpark

Rochelle hosts a 100 word flash fiction competition each week.  Come and have a go!

https://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/

Classy joint! A wonderful view of the car-park from the balcony, sports pitches beyond, suburbia behind that. It’s raining cats and dogs at three in the morning. I’m at the motel because of the blazing row with Karen. I couldn’t handle her alcoholism and paranoia anymore, and walked out.
I know it’s not her fault. The world hates her: friends, family, everyone is out to destroy her. She needs someone to blame and I, who love her most, am prime suspect. All my support and perseverance count for naught.
Was there ever a view as bleak as this? (98)

PHOTO PROMPT -© Rochelle Wisoff-Fields

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About micklively

Fifty-something, pacifist, six sigma black belt, lean implementer, brewer, vintner, guitarist, wood-turner, and slave to collies.
This entry was posted in alcoholic, depression, marriage and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

29 Responses to Bleak

  1. This reminded me of that movie shot in Las Vegas with Nicolas Cage. Very visual. And since I just recently stopped drinking, it hit home. You’re a natural Fictioneerer. 🙂

  2. Poor couple. Because of the woman’s addiction, both of them are miserable. Well done, Mick.— Suzanne

  3. excellent! Hope he gets a better view soon

  4. gahlearner says:

    This is sad and good. If she doesn’t wake up and see what she’s doing, there’s little hope.

  5. Corina says:

    I know people like Karen.
    Nice write!

  6. Dale says:

    Bleak situation. And no one can help her but herself… best to hightail it outta there.

  7. marc says:

    How interesting to read something like this.

  8. Pretty dark stuff. Looks like the protagonist is a real martyr.

  9. The excuse “The world hates me” is so often an excuse to do harm to oneself and others. Perhaps a bit of therapy?

  10. Oh this is the classical of food-chain… it can only end in one way.

  11. She’s got issues. She needs help. Now he must choose to stay or go. Great story; much impact!

  12. Short answer is No. Time to move on. Why waste a life?

  13. Graham Lawrence says:

    Nice story. Captures the bleakness of the Car Park perfectly

  14. JC Axe says:

    Could make a compelling introduction to a novel

  15. Dear Mick,

    This actually was taken from a motel balcony. Rain wasn’t in the forecast. I’m impressed that you managed to come up with two decent stories in less than two hours. 😉

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    • micklively says:

      They just keep popping into my head. Sometimes, I’m not even sure I’m composing them. They’re more like memories (though I have never stayed in a motel).
      Many thanks for your feedback.

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